At the last cabinet meeting, with all of them going on about all the problems including our bankrupt economy, and our issues with the Chinese on the one hand and the Americans on the other, I got lost in Thought – which is totally unfamiliar territory. Then suddenly, I reached a Conclusion. That’s the place you arrive at when you get tired of Thought and give up. I declared to my cabinet, “The hypocrisy of the United States of America is astounding. They said one thing to us here in Islamabad and went and issued a completely different joint statement with the Indians in New Delhi. They’ve always been hypocrites and always will be. Furthermore, their hypocrisy is evident in the qualifications for becoming President. You have to be at least 35 years old and a natural born citizen. What about all those born by C-Section?”
My cabinet was speechless at my wisdom. Shah Mahmood Qureshi began to cough and almost choked, gripping his belly. Mercifully, Dr Yasmin Rashid was sitting in on our cabinet meeting. I asked her to examine him. “I think he’s got acute appendicitis”, she said. “That’s a great compliment Dr Yasmin Rashid and it’s very sweet of you but I’d like a medical diagnosis please”. Once again my cabinet was rendered speechless at my wisdom.
Then I began to regale them with the great success that has been The Great Auction of Nawaz’s Limousines & Buffaloes. “How much money have we raised, Asad?” I asked, “enough to pay off our debts?” Asad Umar then began searching for his calculator and I lost patience and got up and left for Bunny Gala.
What a relief to arrive at Bunny Gala and find some of my old friends lounging on deck chairs out on the terrace. But they all complained that they had headaches and their pills were missing. We summoned the housekeeper and asked him where the pills were. “Never mind the pills”, he said, scampering gleefully on the terrace, “come and see Madam Nur Jehan, Lata, Rafi and Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan all singing together in the kitchen!”
My cabinet was speechless at my wisdom. Shah Mahmood Qureshi began to cough and almost choked, gripping his belly. Mercifully, Dr Yasmin Rashid was sitting in on our cabinet meeting. I asked her to examine him. “I think he’s got acute appendicitis”, she said. “That’s a great compliment Dr Yasmin Rashid and it’s very sweet of you but I’d like a medical diagnosis please”. Once again my cabinet was rendered speechless at my wisdom.
Then I began to regale them with the great success that has been The Great Auction of Nawaz’s Limousines & Buffaloes. “How much money have we raised, Asad?” I asked, “enough to pay off our debts?” Asad Umar then began searching for his calculator and I lost patience and got up and left for Bunny Gala.
What a relief to arrive at Bunny Gala and find some of my old friends lounging on deck chairs out on the terrace. But they all complained that they had headaches and their pills were missing. We summoned the housekeeper and asked him where the pills were. “Never mind the pills”, he said, scampering gleefully on the terrace, “come and see Madam Nur Jehan, Lata, Rafi and Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan all singing together in the kitchen!”
Im the Dim