Meray aziz humwatno, you are seeing how all these MQM wallahs are breaking up with Altaf. I have decided to turn the other chick. But I did send my spy to London to take news of Altaf and also find out if he is indeed going to be beloved of Almighty soon, taubah taubah. Allah ko pyaray honay walay hain. My spy fust went to hospital close to Altaf’s house, thinking he must be admit there. He sneaked in via bacteria (behind of cafeteria) so that people would not be suspicious. He says it was so neat and clean. No dogs or cats roaming around in wards. I told spy that we will donate cat scan so that they can find roaming kitties and pussies.
Reaching what he presumed was Altaf’s room, spy was nervous because he saw nurse approaching. He decided to cauterize her. After he had caught her eyes, she gazed him shyly. “Look here lady” he said, “I’m traditional Muslim man. Please just show me patient, ok?” “Hmmph!” she said and showed him into Altaf’s room. There he was with oxygen mask on his face, dark with liver disease. “Thanks God you did not go into comma,” my spy said. “Inshallah, you will live long and dilate like me who wishes to live to ripe old age. All Pakistani politicians have suffered labour pains because of the good work they have done for the country, but that has made you all emphatic and you emphasize with other sufferers like common man”. No reaction from man in oxygen mask. Then spy turned to nurse and asked, “how serious he is?” “Serious? I dunno watcha mean luv”, nurse said. Spy said, “even if it’s a secretion, please tell me. You can trust me with your secretion.”
Nurse was full of confuyion. “What DO you mean, sir?” she asked loudly. “Shhhh, patient will be disturb. Don’t worry. He is not Seizure. He is ordinary person like you and me”. More confuyion. Spy explained “I mean there is no need to be afraid. He is not Julius Seizure. He is only Altaf Hussain”. “THATS NOT ALTAF! THAT’S ROBERT MUGABE’S BRUVVER!”
Reaching what he presumed was Altaf’s room, spy was nervous because he saw nurse approaching. He decided to cauterize her. After he had caught her eyes, she gazed him shyly. “Look here lady” he said, “I’m traditional Muslim man. Please just show me patient, ok?” “Hmmph!” she said and showed him into Altaf’s room. There he was with oxygen mask on his face, dark with liver disease. “Thanks God you did not go into comma,” my spy said. “Inshallah, you will live long and dilate like me who wishes to live to ripe old age. All Pakistani politicians have suffered labour pains because of the good work they have done for the country, but that has made you all emphatic and you emphasize with other sufferers like common man”. No reaction from man in oxygen mask. Then spy turned to nurse and asked, “how serious he is?” “Serious? I dunno watcha mean luv”, nurse said. Spy said, “even if it’s a secretion, please tell me. You can trust me with your secretion.”
Nurse was full of confuyion. “What DO you mean, sir?” she asked loudly. “Shhhh, patient will be disturb. Don’t worry. He is not Seizure. He is ordinary person like you and me”. More confuyion. Spy explained “I mean there is no need to be afraid. He is not Julius Seizure. He is only Altaf Hussain”. “THATS NOT ALTAF! THAT’S ROBERT MUGABE’S BRUVVER!”
NS