Ittefaq Nama

London is gorgeous in September, cool and peasant. Only problem is, Shbaz Saab was here too. “Bhaijan”, he said, “we are a team. Like the Wright Brothers, who built the world’s first airplane”. I was silent. “Bhaijan, I’m sure the Wright Brothers were initially the Wrong Brothers, but eventually they were Wright”. I was silent. “Bhaijan, there were also the Marx Brothers, who I think failed many tests but eventually passed and became the Full Marx Brothers”.

I was silent.

“Bhaijan, knock, knock!”

“Who’s there?”

“Brotheration! I forgot what I had to say”.

“Bhaijan, do you remember when the local carpenter let you try his saw?”

I was silent.

“You ran after me trying to saw my legs off. Abbaji stopped you and you said, ‘but I was only trying to make him my half-brother!’”

“Bhaijan, do you remember when we were 6 and 8 and we had a big fight? I apologized and we made up when I told you that I could have been a lot worse because I could’ve been a twin.”

“Bhaijan, I’ve been so useful to you. Remember when we first when to China to persuade them to build CPEC in Pakistan?”

I was silent.

“Bhaijan, I told them one in five people in the world is Chinese. There are five of us in our family, so my brother must be Chinese.”

I was silent.

“The Chinese were so delighted, they immediately told you, ‘ha soh! Wi kum tu wok wi yu!”

“Bhaijan ….?”

“I’m the Big Brother”, I told him, “no question. No argument. We’ll just do things My Way.”

Thanks God Shbaz Saab left for Lahore.

NS