Ittefaq Nama

Ittefaq Nama
Afsos, sorrow, that faujis are again overstepping their mandate. They are making arrests of politicians and hounding many from the last gormint. And without consulting me, who is after all, Wazir-e-Azam.

I asked my Interior Minister Mr Bean to come and explain recent arrest of politicians. He said he had no idea that the faujis were going to do it. I told your bhabi that I think he is being economical with the truth. She said, “haw hai! How do you know?” “Because his lips are moving”, I said. Your bhabi said, “try asking him again”.

I looked sternly at Mr Bean and asked, “tell me AT ONCE if you knew about Asif Zardari’s best friend Dr Asim’s arrest”. The minister replied, “AT ONCE!”

I looked at your bhabi. She was also perplexed. In the resulting confuyion, I tried again, “Ahem! I think you’ve been looking over your shoulder. I hope I didn’t see you looking over your shoulder!” “I hope you didn’t either”, Mr Bean replied. Once again, I accosted him. “I know the faujis came to pick you up from your office for a meeting yesterday. What did they say to you before you got into the car?” “Get into the car”, he said.

I sighed and said, “Okay, tell me honestly, did they poke fun at us politicians?” “What do you mean?” asked Mr Bean. “I mean did they tell any political jokes?” “No, I was expecting that but they said the problem with political jokes is that they get elected.”

Exasperated, I asked the minister, “what is big and khaki and eats politicos?”

He replied, “a big, khaki politico eater.”

In a last ditch attempt, I asked, “do you agree with what the faujis are doing?” The minister took me aside and whispered in my ear, “Mian Saab, an argument with them is like a software license agreement. At the end, you ignore everything and click I AGREE.”

Zaalim samaaj

NS