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SUCH GUP

TFT by TFT
December 11, 2020
in Features
Such Gup
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The buck stops here

It’s that same old story. When a government’s performance is poor, the ire inevitably falls on team members. Take the information tsar, the luckless son of a great poet, who has the unenviable task of defending the indefensible. Naturally, it’s an uphill task and The Great Khan is not amused. He is said to be looking for a replacement but the funny thing is, there are no takers!

At the same time, there are plenty of punters for another post at the Interior of things. The Great Khan wants to supplant the present occupant with a “better” captain. The current gent, like the information tsar, is in a difficult situation. He is required to implement a “crack down” on behalf of a government that is low on moral authority and performance. The Khan should stop blaming his colleagues – a famous US President had a sign on his desk saying “the buck stops here”.

Hello Joe!

Talking of US Presidents, we hear The Great Khan has been trying to call the President-Elect to congratulate him but that he hasn’t been able to get through thus far. Why isn’t Mr B taking The Khan’s call? Could it be because of this junta’s inordinate fondness for the Lousy Loser, in whose unattainable victory they were desperately invested?

Blamed & shamed

So, while The Great Khan is keen on blaming and shaming members of his team for the government’s failures, he also expects them to pad up and go out to bat for him. We hear he harangued a cabinet colleague the other day for not being visible on the media in defence of the government. That colleague, being a sugar baron, told The Khan that it was just as well that he was quiet. He said the media would tear him to shreds the moment he opened his mouth to berate the opposition for their corruption. “I’m a cheeni chor, remember? The media will say it’s the pot calling the kettle black,” he is supposed to have declared, hinting at the way the government threw its core members under the bus when the sugar scandal surfaced.

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The Friday Times is Pakistan’s first independent weekly, founded in 1989. In 2021, the publication went into collaboration with digital news platform Naya Daur Media to publish under a daily cycle.


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