All eyes on Yours Truly! He laughs best who laughs last, hain ji? Presswallahs are writing appraisals at departure of journal. Koi sanu vee puchh lavay! Someone please ask me also, hain ji?
Meray aziz humwatno, I need several awards from you. Pride Of Performance Award Far Anger Management Over Last Three Years. Award Far Biting Tongue. Award Far Looking The Other Way. Award Far Doing Sabr. Award Far Keeping My Cool. Sitara-e-Imtiaz Far Sacrificing My Most Allied Allies. Hilal-e-Imtiaz Far Eating Samosa And Sipping Tea When Really Wanting To Tear My Remaining Hair Out. Nishan-e-Pakistan (highest civilian award) Far Living To Fight Another Day.
And I need your salutations far keeping my own counsel during presentations about warring with neighbours – and hoping to win. I need your mobarakbad for not saying “but this is delusional” and “if we can do this then we can also jump on unicorns and go to Disney Land during lunch break”.
Give me a medal, meray aziz humwatno, for at least asking for the password of the nuclear program – in my dreams. BTW (By The Way), I’ve worked out the password. Don’t tell anyone, it’s “MickeyMinnieCinderellaBettyVeronicaSupermanSpidermanIslamabad” – because it’s supposed to be 7 characters and 1 capital.
Belief me, pyaray bhaiyo aur behno, I tried all sorts of ways to postpone difficult meetings. I remember one time when they were all lined up waiting far me. I kept rummaging on my desk. “When will you come, sir?” “Wait a minute, I can’t find my hidden agenda.”
This kind of pressure also had its side effects. The other day I was talking to myself. Your bhabi said, “Hussain’s Abu, you are talking to yourself”. I replied, “of course I am. Sometimes I need expert advice.”
Meray aziz humwatno, I need several awards from you. Pride Of Performance Award Far Anger Management Over Last Three Years. Award Far Biting Tongue. Award Far Looking The Other Way. Award Far Doing Sabr. Award Far Keeping My Cool. Sitara-e-Imtiaz Far Sacrificing My Most Allied Allies. Hilal-e-Imtiaz Far Eating Samosa And Sipping Tea When Really Wanting To Tear My Remaining Hair Out. Nishan-e-Pakistan (highest civilian award) Far Living To Fight Another Day.
And I need your salutations far keeping my own counsel during presentations about warring with neighbours – and hoping to win. I need your mobarakbad for not saying “but this is delusional” and “if we can do this then we can also jump on unicorns and go to Disney Land during lunch break”.
Give me a medal, meray aziz humwatno, for at least asking for the password of the nuclear program – in my dreams. BTW (By The Way), I’ve worked out the password. Don’t tell anyone, it’s “MickeyMinnieCinderellaBettyVeronicaSupermanSpidermanIslamabad” – because it’s supposed to be 7 characters and 1 capital.
Belief me, pyaray bhaiyo aur behno, I tried all sorts of ways to postpone difficult meetings. I remember one time when they were all lined up waiting far me. I kept rummaging on my desk. “When will you come, sir?” “Wait a minute, I can’t find my hidden agenda.”
This kind of pressure also had its side effects. The other day I was talking to myself. Your bhabi said, “Hussain’s Abu, you are talking to yourself”. I replied, “of course I am. Sometimes I need expert advice.”