Provocation
In the latest parliamentary fracas, the Khawaja’s slur, hurled at The Khan’s woman colleague, is indefensible. He’s claimed that the lady is provocative, shouting “thieves, thieves – chor, chor” with regularity. But then the ruling party’s toughs are no less inflammatory. Apparently, every time the lady gets up to speak, they shout “stand up and speak, stand up”, making politically incorrect jibes at her squat physique. Women are easy targets for chauvinists, whether they’re at home, on the street on in parliament.
Hale & hearty
The Quaid-e-Qiwam, who’s supposedly critically ill, was seen in his London home, hale and hearty. Our mole reports that the Quaid sat astride his sofa, larger than life, in a cream boski kurta and white cotton pajama. He was attended by two male nurses and two female; he was meticulously manicured, with rings on his podgy fingers. Guests were served miniature shami kebabs and samosas and the Quaid’s trademark mint chutney.
In the holy month
This Ramazan, let us recall the credentials required for the position of Imam of Istanbul’s Grand Mosque at the time of Sultan Suleyman I, 1520-1566:
- To have mastered Arabic, Latin, Turkish & Persian.
- To have mastered the Quran, Bible & Torah.
- To be a scholar of Sharia & Fiqh.
- To have mastered Physics & Mathematics up to teaching standard.
- To be a master of chivalry, archery & duelling.
- To be of handsome countenance.
- To have a strong, melodious voice.
(Source: Al Ahram newspaper, Egypt, September 22, 1986)