Nuggets from the Urdu press

These nuggets are culled from the Urdu press. They are summarised here without comment. Absurd or ridiculous, tft takes no responsibility for them.

Nuggets from the Urdu press

Rename Altaf Hussain University 


tft-33-p-10-j


Reported in Nawa-e-Waqt (August 12, 2015) a journalist has filed a petition in the Sindh High Court asking to change the name of Altaf Hussain University in Hyderabad. With his statements against the army, Altaf Hussain has committed treason. The university should be renamed Liaqat Ali Khan University.

Showdown at Gujranwala police station


tft-33-p-10-k


According to Dunya (Augus 13, 2015) a woman beat up a DSP with a shoe (chhitrol) at a police station in Gujranwala. She said the two had been having an affair, but when she asked him to marry her, he made a fake bribery case against her. When the DSP saw news reporters, he ran to his office, and she ran after him with a shoe in her hand. When she tried to enter his office, he punched and kicked her out. Complainants and citizens at the police station were entertained (mehzooz).

MQM resigned under ‘blood pressure’


tft-33-p-10-l


Nawa-e-Waqt reports (August 13, 2015) when the NA speaker asked members of the MQM if they were under pressure to resign, they said they only pressure they had was blood pressure. They also took selfies in the speakers chamber.

Justice Wajihuddin ‘led astray’


tft-33-p-10-m


Quoted in Jang (August 14) Imran Khan’s wife Reham Khan said someone must have lead Justice Wajihuddin astray (gumrah). He used to compare Imran Khan with Muhammad Ali Jinnah. What caused a u-turn in his opinion?

Millions worth of streetlight equipment stolen in Lahore 


tft-33-p-10-n


Transformers, electric cable and electronic devices worth millions of rupees were stolen from various major roads of Lahore, because of which the streetlight systems are not functional, Dunya reports (August 15, 2015). In order to hide the truth (maamlaat ko dabatay hue) the administration has issued Rs 72,176,000 to replace the stolen equipment.

Bilawal gets a Rakhi from India woman


tft-33-p-10-o


Reported in Jang (Aug 16, 2015) an Indian woman from Kerala has sent a Rakhi to Bilawal Bhutto Zardari at Bilawal House in Karachi. She said in an accompanying message that she appreciates his efforts against intolerance in the society.

Holes in PIA plane covered with plastic tape


tft-33-p-10-p


According to Dunya (August 18, 2015) PIA engineers tried to close holes under the nose of a plane with plastic tape. The tape came off because of the wind even before the plane took off. The passengers were made to wait in the lounge until the plane was fixed. They protested and asked for stern action against the engineers.

Vote for Gen Raheel Sharif


tft-33-p-10-q


Nawa-e-Waqt reports (August 18, 2015) when votes were being counted for the by election in NA 19, the names of all the contestants were crossed out on one ballot paper and there was a slogan in favor of Gen Raheel Sharif. The staff and the media were surprised to see that (dang reh gaye).

Girl claims GCU rejected her because of Hijab 


tft-33-p-10-r


Express reports (August 19, 2015) a girl has sued GC University Lahore for denying her admission because she wore a Hijab. The court has issued a notice to the GCU administration. The registrar denied the allegation and said there were thousands of girls in the university wear a Hijab.

‘Indian Hindus should become human bombs against Pakistan’ 


tft-33-p-10-s


According to Jang (August 19, 2015) Hindu group Shiv Sena has urged Hindus of India to become human bombs and attack Pakistan (dhawa bol dena chahiye). They should live in India with pride, and their voice should resonate like the roar of a lion.