I admire the optimism and survival skills of those who regularly write or publish about Pakistani politics for a living. Having said that, this federal government has had two problems since its inception: the political ones are insoluble and the economic ones are incomprehensible.
No one mistakes Mr Dar’s assertiveness or eloquence for good economic ideas, which is why he is constantly tossed around in a tempest of mockery and disdain. Taking a leaf out of Shahbaz Sharif’s book, the federal government also decided to deploy the special weapon called “civil servants” – the problem is that it does not work, and it cannot be fired!
While scanning the political arena for interesting characters to write about, I just about recognized Marvi Memon gasping for air in the dungeons of the Youth Loan Programme. I was tempted but dissuaded by a veteran of public service, “Avoid women (in public life) approaching 45 – while wondering from which direction, you get hit”.
A nation’s problems, however, do not only involve economic injustice; they may lie in a number of small intra-personal behaviours that corrupt the daily life. As human beings, we are expected to be concerned about others’ well being and respect their choices. Since we have a genuine regard for ourselves, we would naturally wish others to be happy and successful. However, children giggle when another child falls down and adults find TV and Internet images of people crashing and making mistakes enormously amusing.
Rehman Malik may be a successful politician in his own eyes but his mousy over-dyed hair, inappropriate flashing ties and misuse of language are a butt of national jokes. Maulana Fazlur Rehman is another character whose accent and shifting political allegiances are an ongoing source of rip-roaring laughter. What sins, one might ask, have these poor souls committed to deserve such relentless tossing? I suspect the answer would be, “Many!”
Making fun of others is not a recent phenomenon nor is it restricted to any geographical region or race. Intellectuals have been trying to understand our ‘need’ to laugh at others for a long time. Some describe it as a sudden sense of glory in comparison with others’ infirmity while others consider it a response to the presence of inflexibility in life. A different way to look at it would be through Maslow’s “hierarchy of needs”, which are supposed to motivate human behaviour. At the bottom of his pyramid are the physical needs (food, water, sleep) and, as people progress, the needs become increasingly psychological and social (love, friendship, intimacy). At the peak of this hierarchy is self-actualization. It would be an interesting exercise to ascertain where we as a nation feature on this pyramid of needs. To give you a clue, self-actualized people accept themselves as they are and treat others the same, regardless of their background and status.
'A side dish for the City of London feast' – Napoleon on a plate ready to be carved, 1814
Good jokes are imaginative and touch a vital nerve linked to our hidden desires and vulnerabilities with great timing. Comedians make fun of others, but it is perceived differently because many are “in” on the joke when a morsel of truth is being stretched. But humour is also used to criticize and manipulate others as a socially acceptable way of making others look bad so that we look good. This phenomenon visibly crept into our public life through political talk shows on TV in the Musharaf era. They became popular as the public felt librated and anticipated better times ahead. The ratings of such TV programmes, however, plummeted during the Zardari regime due to its thick skin to even genuine criticism and a non-response to the steady rise of terrorism. Since the elections, however, a new national trend of collective denial has emerged. People appear to be numb to the economic and political adversity around them. They do not want to know – watching a plethora of comedy programmes and escaping into the magnificent past through imported Turkish soaps is a national pastime.
Poking fun at others may strike at their feelings, pride, identity or ego. Why do we find it funny to put down, hurt or even abuse other people? The psychology is complex, straddling cultural subtexts and primitive human emotions. For example, bullying may be a unique archetype of making fun of others. It consists of different types of behaviours ranging from verbal or physical intimidation, teasing and threats of violence. It also includes cyber bullying through email, text messaging, and social networks. Bullies seem to find happiness in an agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of another. We do not have to go far to search for its examples in public life: Chaudhry Nisar’s treatment of Tariq Malik (NADRA), GHQ’s indifference to missing persons and a TV anchor’s thrashing of another. When challenged, these jokers do not walk away with the proverbial “just kidding” defence; they insist on being right and refuse to take responsibility. No one realizes that these insults or cheap victories leave behind individual and collective emotional scars.
[quote]The Big Ben was named after Sir Benjamin Hall, whose physical dimensions were similar to the massive bell[/quote]
Not many people know that Big Ben is not the name of the clock at the Houses of Parliament in London; it is the 13-ton bell inside that sounds the hours. It was named after Sir Benjamin Hall, Commissioner of Works, whose physical dimensions were similar to the massive bell. This may be an example of ‘constructive’ fun but more often than not it is utilized to feel bigger and better while making the others feel smaller and worse. This may have worked in the school playground but it makes the perpetrator look small in the real adult world. We can spot a nervous person easily because they have the same look about them that we have when we are nervous. One of the main reasons a person mocks another is that they see some of their own traits in the other person, which they cannot tolerate. All of us have a side to our personality we do not like to expose. This is where we subconsciously hide our dark thoughts and negative experiences suffered in the past. When we make fun of others, we actually project these negative thoughts and feelings onto them. The insidious and caustic nature of making fun of others is, however, a zero sum game where no one wins.
Nothing is more valued than a sense of humour in the modern social stakes. We seek it in others and are proud to claim it in ourselves. If someone has a great sense of humour, we perceive him or her to be happy and socially confident. This was not always the case. History records that Napoleon Bonaparte was a great general. However, the British history often portrays him as a “squirt, short-arse, virtual midget”. He had the average height, 5 ft 6 inch, of a French man of his time but this did not stop the British from naming a complex after him ie “The Napoleon Complex” (Short Man Syndrome). This attitude would not have surprised the ancient Greeks though who believed that humour is essentially aggressive. On a similar note, Drs Aamir Liaqat & Babar Awan would be chuffed to know that Dr Seuss, the famous American writer of children’s books, was neither a medical doctor nor received a PhD. He just added the Dr to his name because his mother had always wanted him to study medicine!
[quote]Those on the right are called "Ghairat Brigade" and those on the left are called "Liberal Fascists"[/quote]
The content and state of the media in Pakistan reflects the national confusion, identity crisis and dissolution of our social contract. Some proprietors of the media are busy slugging out their financial interests by making fun of one another in the name of a quasi-ideological war. TV anchors and newspaper columnists on opposite sides are firing strange terminologies at each other - those on the right are “Ghairat Brigade” and those on the left are called “Liberal Fascists”. We can’t remove suffering from life, but we can try to either avoid or learn to suffer more successfully - with less sense of persecution or impression that we have unfairly been singled out for this punishment. As a practicing psychiatrist, I would advise all stakeholders to shake hands and then sit down to re-evaluate their priorities in the national interest. The custom of shaking hands is not a difficult start because it originated to show that both parties were unarmed. I would also abide by the ancient Chinese custom that doctors could receive fees only if their patient was cured. Alternatively, they could muse on the parable that two great men were sleeping with naked women in the same timeline – Mr Gandhi perfected his celibate state and Mr Nehru altered the map of India. Take your pick.
Current thinking is that humour is triple-edged - it helps form better relationships, eats away at our self-esteem and can antagonize others. Emotional abuse caused by making fun or bullying may cause depression, social withdrawal, anxiety and substance abuse among the victims. There is no right or wrong about dealing with the bully who makes fun of you. Insults affect people in different ways so they deal with it differently. They may choose to walk away, “turn the other cheek” or wail incessantly. Research suggests that you never put up with it because it turns into a ‘cycle of abuse’ in the society – the victim displacing his anger and distress on another person and this cycles on. When you are at the end of it, assertively say, “Please stop (pause!)… I just want to clarify (pause!)…. Did you actually say (repeat the insult!) to me?”. This usually stops the bully in his tracks and he would be careful in the future. If it this does not work, you may decide to walk away after saying politely, but firmly, that you were finding it hard to take this abuse. If required, try the formal complaint route through appropriate channel as a next stage. You may dread the consequences of your actions at the time, but global research has nothing but good news for you, your colleagues and the society consequently.
The writer is a consultant psychiatrist and director of medical education in England
