1. ‘An older woman who liked macho horses treated me like a young stallion’
2. ‘What was the universe trying to say to me by depriving me of both my penis and my brother?’
3. ‘I got all that from her face. Her luminous, angelic face.’
4. ‘That’s love, I thought, though I managed to keep the words inside.’
5. ‘Beside the fruit and veg I felt her stroll past me’
6. She really is magic, I thought. Even the seals know it.’
7. I read them as a citation, a remembrance, a proclamation. I read them as a decree.’
8. Time, as the doctor predicted, would fix my todger. When would it work its magic on my heart?
9. I could take out a cactus from three miles away with a Hellfire missile but I couldn’t quite find her lips
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