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Home Features

SUCH GUP: To the wolves

TFT Features Desk by TFT Features Desk
March 18, 2022 - Updated on March 19, 2022
in Features, Main Slider
SUCH GUP: To the wolves
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To the wolves

So, finally, The Boyz seem to have thrown The Great Khan and his fast-dwindling horde to the wolves. The reasons for the swift meltdown, we hear, are firstly that Al-Prince was to attend the conference of the brethren and he has since backed out. So, now there’s no need to keep a lid on a volcano that is about to burst anyway. No need to keep up appearances for His Royal Highness’s arrival. Readers will recall the Maulana’s statement exhorting the opposition’s supporters to descend upon Isloo not before March 25th. Well, that was in order not to embarrass the visiting brethren, especially Al-Prince. With the latter not showing up now, that pressure has lifted.

The other reason is unmentionable – something to do with a video expose The Great Khan has up his sleeve. His closest advisors have begged him to desist, this being a nuclear option, but his inclination is to bat “to the last ball” as he keeps saying in cricketing metaphors.

Underground

The list of The Great Khan’s aides who have gone to the ground is growing by the day. Apart from A Sad Age putting up a brave face, and the blustering Chaudhry Einstein, the foulmouthed Gill, and the false bravado of Sheeda Tully, most others have beat a retreat. We hear Shafto, The Khan’s education tsar is nowhere to be found – he’s even cleared out of his office next to Bozo The Clown, having earlier taken charge of organizing The Khan’s hordes in the Punjab. Ditto re SMQ, who’s never been a great favourite of The Khan in any case. And we all know that the Invisible One has been out of sight for ages.

At a recent informal meeting of a few mins, the gloomy consensus was that “The Khan should never have taken on The Boyz”. One min laughed bitterly and said, “It’s all very well for the Khan to say ‘get ready to sit on opposition benches’, my worry is we’ll be sitting on jail benches”.

Out of the closet

There’s a growing feeling in the government’s camp that they’ve been shafted by their very own sleuths. These civilian snoops, say The Khan’s partisans, deliberately kept the government in the dark about the number of MNAs amassed by the opposition, and the resentment amongst the allies. Our mole says The Khan’s inner cabal was shocked by the numbers that came tumbling out of the closet – no less than by the vociferousness and brazenness of the allies.

Also Read:

Justice Cornelius Remains A Figure Of Inspiration For Pakistan’s Judiciary

Cabinet Rejects Possibility Of Early Elections, Vows To Implement Electoral Reforms Before Polls

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The Friday Times is Pakistan’s first independent weekly, founded in 1989. In 2021, the publication went into collaboration with digital news platform Naya Daur Media to publish under a daily cycle.


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