SUCH GUP: Panic stations

SUCH GUP: Panic stations

Panic stations


Our mole reports that the canny in The Great Khan’s horde are panicking at the prospect of their patron’s dethronement. One such told our mole that he was busy straightening his accounts and other “affairs”. He also revealed that The Great Khan’s clan is now clearly divisible into two camps – there are those who are “clearing the decks” and “moving assets” be it via launch to an Emirate or panic selling on the market or hiding ill-gotten gains, whilst simultaneously sacrificing those poor old black bakras, to those who continue to live in La La Land. Amongst the latter is the Sibling of Sewing Machine fame who, though not on talking terms with bro, is one of the biggest beneficiaries of the decades long fund-raising scheme. Sibling is convinced that this is a storm in a tea cup and all will be hunky dory soon enough. Her stand-off with her long-term business partner continues and she is so confident of retaining power that she has not thought fit to resolve it. The former partner, meanwhile, is waiting for the day of reckoning when she hopes the Courts, free of the burden of pressure, will well and truly hear her plaint.


As for The Great Khan’s offspring, they are effectively estranged. We hear he has not seen them in these three years for more than those two pre-COVID days when they came to Pk to attend a cousin’s wedding. Nor has he spoken to them, we hear from the same source.


Post-Script: all of The Great Khan’s old domestic staffers have been shown the door, including his chauffeur of decades long service. The gent was known as Mr Ambassador in the local lingo, and was privy to all the goings-on. Perhaps that’s why his services have been dispensed with.


Defections galore


The mystery of the postponed joint session of Parliament is no mystery at all. True to their DNA, businessmen-politicos of the ruling party did such a decisive no-show that The Great Khan & Co had no option but to postpone the session. We hear that one score and one Member did not so much as attend That Call! Lest we Forget, with a capital F, that this is the call The Khan’s erstwhile party FaithFul were previously utterly careFul to attend, come hell or high water. How times change! When The Khan heard of this, he asked his right-hand man to undertake an honest assessment of possible defections, in case of a no-confidence vote. The man was honest enough to put the assessment at 24, 3 up from the number of those who didn’t heed that FateFul call to attend the previous session.