Listen, listen! Suno, suno! Khawaja Asif messaged me on WhatsApp, “Mian Saab, can you belief it? Donald Trump rang me to ask for contact of Number One. He says that he is loosing. Dhandli is happening. He needs urgent help”. I messaged back, “Khawaja Saab, please remember that I have forbidden you all to communicate with buoys. Tell Trump to shut dawn Results Transmission System. Bus, what else, hain ji?”
Then I thought that let me to call Trump myself also to make sure he doesn’t talk to buoys. “Hello Mr President. I’m afraid you cannot talk to buoys. I have forbidden it. You are suffering from dhandli? I am expurrt. It has happened to me also, in big way. Let me advice you”. Trump replied that “thyanks but no thyanks. I’m havin’ my last supper at the moment”. Food always perrks my interest, as you know. “Really?” I said, “what what is?”
Trump relayed the menu to me:
Starter
Deprived shrimp
Money-glazed smirked salmon
Scorn fritters
Entry
Battered electorate
With basket of crushed hopes
And slow-cooked fatigue
Half-baked notions
Idling on soft bed of privilege
Served with thick faux pas sauce
Cooked books
Deep-famished, with a deprivation of vegetables
And relish reduction
Toads in the hole
With golden handouts in thick, rich gravy
(self-serving only)
Desert
Eton mess
Fudge (420 flavours)
Digestif
Ass liqueur
Just a mint, I said, naw I have to talk to my old friend Joe Biden. “Congratulations, Joe! What’s on your menu?”
Joe replied, “human rights, press freedom and climate change.”
Hooray!
NS
Then I thought that let me to call Trump myself also to make sure he doesn’t talk to buoys. “Hello Mr President. I’m afraid you cannot talk to buoys. I have forbidden it. You are suffering from dhandli? I am expurrt. It has happened to me also, in big way. Let me advice you”. Trump replied that “thyanks but no thyanks. I’m havin’ my last supper at the moment”. Food always perrks my interest, as you know. “Really?” I said, “what what is?”
Trump relayed the menu to me:
Starter
Deprived shrimp
Money-glazed smirked salmon
Scorn fritters
Entry
Battered electorate
With basket of crushed hopes
And slow-cooked fatigue
Half-baked notions
Idling on soft bed of privilege
Served with thick faux pas sauce
Cooked books
Deep-famished, with a deprivation of vegetables
And relish reduction
Toads in the hole
With golden handouts in thick, rich gravy
(self-serving only)
Desert
Eton mess
Fudge (420 flavours)
Digestif
Ass liqueur
Just a mint, I said, naw I have to talk to my old friend Joe Biden. “Congratulations, Joe! What’s on your menu?”
Joe replied, “human rights, press freedom and climate change.”
Hooray!
NS