Ramadan Kareem, as my ex-best friend MBS would say. Why ex-best friend? Because with oil at its lowest, and the economy in disarray, he has nothing to offer.
I’m keeping all my fasts, alhamdolillah, and every iftar the cook asks me what I want as the main course. “I’d like some MSR please, with Shahbaz Sharif for dessert”. “But Mian Shahbaz isn’t particularly sweet, Khan Sahab”, says the cook. “In that case, let’s have some Sweet & Sour Shahbaz with rice as the main course, and we can have MSR for dessert”.
“But doesn’t MSR stick in the throat, Khan Sahab, given that there’s no case against him and all you’re doing is putting pressure on him to crush GEO’s independence?” “STOP IT! YOU ARE MY COOK! NOT MY CONSCIENCE!”
Then he looks away and asks what I want for starters to break my fast. “I’ll have Pervez Elahi Pakoras, and Chaudhry Shujaat Chaat, IF YOU DON’T MIND!” Ufff! Corona-quarantined cooks these days are SO entitled.
“Khan Sahab” he begins, and I look heavenwards. “Ye-e-e-e-s?” I say exasperatedly. “Why are we leaving out Bilawal Bhallay and Fazlurrahman Falooda? Shall I serve them up too?”
I think I’m going to send my cook to NAB. My complaint is going to be that 33 years ago, when my family first employed him, he got a loan write-off. I WILL NEVER EVER TOLERATE THEIVES AND DACOITS AND CHEENI CHO – er sorry, um I mean not if they belong to my Party …
You see how I manage to get out of the holes that I dig for myself? It’s all because The Boyz are on my side. I can do no wrong. When Angela Merkel called me to offer help, I told her that it was she who needed help because Europe would soon split up. After Brexit, there’ll be Quitaly, Españope, Swedone, Helsinkhole, Czech-out, Slovacate, Lat-me-out and Polend with its capital at Withdrawsaw. The Boyz had to placate her. Then I Tweeted in reply to Trump: Post-Corona, US will split. Floriddance, Arizonation, Ohio & Bye-o, Oregone and so on. The Boyz calmed him down.
Im the Dim
I’m keeping all my fasts, alhamdolillah, and every iftar the cook asks me what I want as the main course. “I’d like some MSR please, with Shahbaz Sharif for dessert”. “But Mian Shahbaz isn’t particularly sweet, Khan Sahab”, says the cook. “In that case, let’s have some Sweet & Sour Shahbaz with rice as the main course, and we can have MSR for dessert”.
“But doesn’t MSR stick in the throat, Khan Sahab, given that there’s no case against him and all you’re doing is putting pressure on him to crush GEO’s independence?” “STOP IT! YOU ARE MY COOK! NOT MY CONSCIENCE!”
Then he looks away and asks what I want for starters to break my fast. “I’ll have Pervez Elahi Pakoras, and Chaudhry Shujaat Chaat, IF YOU DON’T MIND!” Ufff! Corona-quarantined cooks these days are SO entitled.
“Khan Sahab” he begins, and I look heavenwards. “Ye-e-e-e-s?” I say exasperatedly. “Why are we leaving out Bilawal Bhallay and Fazlurrahman Falooda? Shall I serve them up too?”
I think I’m going to send my cook to NAB. My complaint is going to be that 33 years ago, when my family first employed him, he got a loan write-off. I WILL NEVER EVER TOLERATE THEIVES AND DACOITS AND CHEENI CHO – er sorry, um I mean not if they belong to my Party …
You see how I manage to get out of the holes that I dig for myself? It’s all because The Boyz are on my side. I can do no wrong. When Angela Merkel called me to offer help, I told her that it was she who needed help because Europe would soon split up. After Brexit, there’ll be Quitaly, Españope, Swedone, Helsinkhole, Czech-out, Slovacate, Lat-me-out and Polend with its capital at Withdrawsaw. The Boyz had to placate her. Then I Tweeted in reply to Trump: Post-Corona, US will split. Floriddance, Arizonation, Ohio & Bye-o, Oregone and so on. The Boyz calmed him down.
Im the Dim