Thanks God we are in London for Eid. Away from heat and the hubs of Lahore. Vaisay, funny thing about London is that it looks just like purana London, you know when it was part of WeYou. Harrods is still exactly where it was and Oxford Street is still in London and not in Oxford and Hide Park is still not Hidden. And all the ameer Arabs and Indians and Russians are still here and also all those ghareeb goras like the Poles and Romanians and Crow Asians are still here. I swear nothing has changed after Breaks It. Only thing that’s changed is that pounds have gone down and racism has gone up. Apparently the British goras now don’t feel shy any more about telling everyone to go home. I’m very worried that someone might shout at Janoo or my poor shweetoo Kulchoo, that Paki go home. I’m not so worried about myself because you know na that I tau look like a foreigner with my light skin, light hairs and light eyes. Even the girl who high lights my hairs in Sleeping Beauties, my beauty saloon in Lahore, told me; ‘Hai aap tau bilkul foreigner lagti hain.’
Everyone is predicating that property prices are going to fall in London. Serves Sunny right. Two months ago she was telling to me, ‘Bhai, our one two bed flat in Kensington is worth more than all your husband’s squares of land in Sharkpur. Imagine, our cute little flat being worth so many millions – in pounds darling, bechaaray rupee ko kaun poochhta hai?’ Now with the pound down in the dumbs and property prices in London also beginning to slide – apparently with all this Breaks It tamasha still unfolding nobody is investigating their money in London real state – she’s received not one but two tight slaps. We’re to patriots, I told Sunny proudly, we’re putting our money where are mouth is – in Pakistan. And like a super patriot, I immediately went to Harrods and bought a green Prada bag, in same colour as our flag.
Everyone is predicating that property prices are going to fall in London. Serves Sunny right. Two months ago she was telling to me, ‘Bhai, our one two bed flat in Kensington is worth more than all your husband’s squares of land in Sharkpur. Imagine, our cute little flat being worth so many millions – in pounds darling, bechaaray rupee ko kaun poochhta hai?’ Now with the pound down in the dumbs and property prices in London also beginning to slide – apparently with all this Breaks It tamasha still unfolding nobody is investigating their money in London real state – she’s received not one but two tight slaps. We’re to patriots, I told Sunny proudly, we’re putting our money where are mouth is – in Pakistan. And like a super patriot, I immediately went to Harrods and bought a green Prada bag, in same colour as our flag.