Janoo is such a stuck in the mud. Last week I told him, ‘Dekho, you want me to spend more time in Sharkpur, no?’
‘Possibly.’
‘Tau let’s do up your haveli and make it all mod con and comfy. Then we can show it off with a tabahi party.’
‘What did you have in mind?’ he asked, a small si frown appearing on his four head.
‘Nothing much. We could just cover those old brick floors in marble and rip out that sand stone fountain in the courtyard and replace it with a rockery with a nice sa statue of a Greekan maiden like I saw in House and Garden magazine and a crystal ka chandelayer and some leather sofas with steal kay arms. Hai na?’
‘Your ideas are, as always, extremely interesting,’ said Janoo, ‘but I’m afraid we don’t have the money right now.’
‘You have money for your things but not mine, haan?’
‘What ‘my things?’ Which chandeliers and Greek statues have I bought?’
‘Every time you go to a bookstore you buy up half the shop. Yesterday you came home with ten books. Each one at least two thou. With that much money I could get not one but three three Greekan statutes.’
‘Those books are for Kulchoo also. He enjoys reading. We should encourage him.’
‘We should encourage him to do stitching and sowing? Haan?’ I said, ‘You think so that’s good for a boy?’
‘Stitching and sewing?’ he asked. ‘What are you on about?’
‘Don’t lie ji. I’ve seen the books you got him yesterday. The Art of Hemming Ways. A Spool of Blue Thread. The By You Tapestry.’
Then I ran out of the room and called Mummy and cried on the phone and told her about how Janoo is such a kanjoos makhi choos. And she sighed and said: ‘Your Daddy was like this also. For men these things are genital.’
‘Possibly.’
‘Tau let’s do up your haveli and make it all mod con and comfy. Then we can show it off with a tabahi party.’
‘What did you have in mind?’ he asked, a small si frown appearing on his four head.
‘Nothing much. We could just cover those old brick floors in marble and rip out that sand stone fountain in the courtyard and replace it with a rockery with a nice sa statue of a Greekan maiden like I saw in House and Garden magazine and a crystal ka chandelayer and some leather sofas with steal kay arms. Hai na?’
‘Your ideas are, as always, extremely interesting,’ said Janoo, ‘but I’m afraid we don’t have the money right now.’
‘You have money for your things but not mine, haan?’
‘What ‘my things?’ Which chandeliers and Greek statues have I bought?’
‘Every time you go to a bookstore you buy up half the shop. Yesterday you came home with ten books. Each one at least two thou. With that much money I could get not one but three three Greekan statutes.’
‘Those books are for Kulchoo also. He enjoys reading. We should encourage him.’
‘We should encourage him to do stitching and sowing? Haan?’ I said, ‘You think so that’s good for a boy?’
‘Stitching and sewing?’ he asked. ‘What are you on about?’
‘Don’t lie ji. I’ve seen the books you got him yesterday. The Art of Hemming Ways. A Spool of Blue Thread. The By You Tapestry.’
Then I ran out of the room and called Mummy and cried on the phone and told her about how Janoo is such a kanjoos makhi choos. And she sighed and said: ‘Your Daddy was like this also. For men these things are genital.’