Last night, General Zia marhoom came in my dream. “Ramzan Mubarak, Zia Sahab”, I proclamated. Zia Sahab didn’t look happy – “I thought I had tutored you well. Have you forgotten? It is Ramadan, not Ramzan”. I bowed my head and said, “You are right Dia Sahab”. He replied, “Who this Dia is?” I said, “You only. If Ramzan is Ramadan, Zia is Dia. That is how it is pronounced in Arabic. And we are Arabs, are we not?”
Zia Sahab did not reply and turned to leaf. I said, “Allah Hafiz, Dia Sahab. Once upon a time we used to say Khuda Hafiz but no longer, since Khuda is Persian and Allah is Arabic, and we became Arabs after your 1977 coup against Bhutto. Anyways, kindly send me some bakoras for iftar”. At this Zia Saab asked, “bakoras?” I replied, “Bakoras, not pakoras because there is no ‘P’ in Arabic. So Pakistan is Bakistan and pakoras are bakoras.”
Again he turned to leaf, and I said, “and please send one cold bottle of Bebsi also”. At this he flew into a rag and shotted, “you have gone mad! Paagal ho gaye ho!” “Oh ho, Dia Saab, I am not paagal, I am simply baagal.”
Then suddenly your bhabi awoke me for sehri. Cold lassi was had, with one paratha and a few kababs. After prayers, I saw some leftover files. Upon my instructions to do something innovative and reliefing for people of Pakistan in area of medicine, Halth Ministry sent following proposals: “Sir, we are working on following madications to help women of Pakistan:
1. Mirrorcillin: a 5 cc dose will enable women to walk past mirrors without pausing.
2. Stopnaggin: a 50 mcg dose will give women vague sense of contentment towards their husbands.
3. Buynotran: a 1 mg dose will enable women to ignore sale notices on shop windows.”
What a nice, I thought, and shared the good news with your bhabi. She suggested one more addition: “Remoticon: a 25 mcg dose will enable men to share the TV remote control with their wives.”
Coming soon, to a shop near you!
Zia Sahab did not reply and turned to leaf. I said, “Allah Hafiz, Dia Sahab. Once upon a time we used to say Khuda Hafiz but no longer, since Khuda is Persian and Allah is Arabic, and we became Arabs after your 1977 coup against Bhutto. Anyways, kindly send me some bakoras for iftar”. At this Zia Saab asked, “bakoras?” I replied, “Bakoras, not pakoras because there is no ‘P’ in Arabic. So Pakistan is Bakistan and pakoras are bakoras.”
Again he turned to leaf, and I said, “and please send one cold bottle of Bebsi also”. At this he flew into a rag and shotted, “you have gone mad! Paagal ho gaye ho!” “Oh ho, Dia Saab, I am not paagal, I am simply baagal.”
Then suddenly your bhabi awoke me for sehri. Cold lassi was had, with one paratha and a few kababs. After prayers, I saw some leftover files. Upon my instructions to do something innovative and reliefing for people of Pakistan in area of medicine, Halth Ministry sent following proposals: “Sir, we are working on following madications to help women of Pakistan:
1. Mirrorcillin: a 5 cc dose will enable women to walk past mirrors without pausing.
2. Stopnaggin: a 50 mcg dose will give women vague sense of contentment towards their husbands.
3. Buynotran: a 1 mg dose will enable women to ignore sale notices on shop windows.”
What a nice, I thought, and shared the good news with your bhabi. She suggested one more addition: “Remoticon: a 25 mcg dose will enable men to share the TV remote control with their wives.”
Coming soon, to a shop near you!
NS